Hola. My name is Daniel Pedro Lopez Sanchez-Mendez. I live in a small house. I have often looked to the horizon at larger houses and thought of the opportunity they would afford me and my family.
With the encouragement of my government (who wants to demolish my house and put in a shoppping mall for increased tax revenue) I have decided to do what's best for my family and move... to John McCain's house.
Huge bathrooms, 3 car garages, chandeliers and large screen tv's are some of the rights that I get denied in my own house. At McCain's house I am able to excercise my rights.
At first he won't notice I'm there, or if he does he will simply turn a blind eye because we will stay out of his way. His neighbors will love me because I will offer to babysit their kids and undercut the prices of the local high schoolers who are currently doing it. I am able to do this because I'm living in McCain's house, feeding the children with McCain's food, using McCain's electricity and water.
But soon I will get more comfortable. I will move my family from the basement to the living room. One day McCain will come home to find me in the master bedroom, soiling his sheets.
When he protests his neighbors will all defend me, I have been a great conveniance in their lives. They will shame McCain for trying to defend his own house.
As a possible compromise they will suggest that me and my family can stay in his house for an additional 6 years while I continue to eat his food, use his electricity and water and helping myself to his medicine cabinet.
Everyone will be happy.