New Ann Coulter column

Woodward Does Washington
Rather more prosaically, Felt leaked details of the Watergate investigation to The Washington Post only because he had lost a job promotion—making him the Richard Clarke of the Watergate era. This will come as small consolation to the Cambodians and Vietnamese tortured and slaughtered as a direct result of Nixon's fall. Oh, well. At least we got a good movie and Jimmy Carter out of it.

Also ironic is that Felt's free-love, flower-girl daughter was estranged from her father for decades on account of her rejection of conventional bourgeois institutions such as marriage. Now she is broke—because of her rejection of conventional bourgeois institutions such as marriage. (Too bad she didn't follow Pop's advice to "follow the money.")

She lives in a house bought for her by her father (evidently skirting the standard "as long as you live in my house you'll live by my rules" lecture) and said she decided to reveal her father as Deep Throat to try to make some more money. "I'm still a single mom," she explained, "I am not ashamed of this." She ought to be. See, the idea of marriage is to get a man other than your own father to support you while you raise children. (Guess what she does? That's right! She's a teacher!)

You didn't read it in a newspaper, you read it in an Ann Coulter column!