SPECIAL REPORT, DUDE!
THE ELECTION OF 2004 EXPLAINED!
...the Presidential election of 2004 is entirely explained by two simple maps. The top image shows county-by-county results of the election. Counties won by Kerry shown in Blue, while those won by Bush are shown in Red. The bottom map shows the results of a recent study by the Department of Health and Human Services, quantifying marijuana use by region, each region composed of one to several counties. Those regions in which more people are stoned are shown in pinky red. The scientific results are undeniable: Democrats are all on drugs.
Commented Howard Dean upon hearing of the study, "Republicans are pretty much an uptight, Sober Party" who are "not very friendly to stoned folks." Adding "These results purposely neglect the growing importance of medical marijuana in our society, which as a Doctor and someone who is --at this very moment-- stoned out of my freakin' mind, I resent."
You must see these two maps side by side! It is amazing how the "blue counties" on the election map coincide almost perfectly with the "high percentage of marijuana use" areas on the Department of Health and Human Services map. Hilarious!
9 comments:
Man, yo why are you trippin'. Y'all needs to get served...
Like there's a genuine correspondence between the two maps!
Maybe I should look for maps re drunken driving and wife-beating. If they happened to correspond to red counties, would you consider that to be indicative of anything?
Probably not.
Trey, man, you need to get your head on straight. We white Christian Republicans are so much better than those pot smoking NPR-listening hippie Liberals.
Yeah Trey, please look at maps with drunken driving and wife beating statistics. I would love to see the correlation.
I have a feeling that it's the drug addicts that are doing most of that though.
Daniel,
I'm so glad you asked! I've found a map of spousal homicides. It shows that 10 of the top 12 states where spousal homicide is most prevalent are RED states.
I guess this too ENTIRELY explains the 2004 Presidential election!
I guess it goes to show that Republican males voted Bush, then killed their wives. Aah yes! Strong family values.
That's some excellent research Trey but the maps just don't line up as perfectly. Looking side by side it is hard notice a corespondence.
You have to admit that the marijuana map lines up perfectly...
Plus you need to admit that most marijana smokers are registered Democrats. Thank goodness they are usually too apathetic to vote.
Looking side by side it is hard notice a corespondence.
Sounds like you're a bit impaired. Hmm. Maybe you're a Dem and you didn't realize it.
That's actually pretty funny Trey. But no, I'm afraid that even if I was impaired I would not understand liberal logic.
Hey, I've NEVER tried pot nor have I ever been intoxicated. I don't understand liberal logic either. (If you haven't noticed, I'm a militant leftist.)
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