Tuesday, September 19, 2006

A possible disorder?

I have noticed a phenomenon amongst some liberals. They have a compulsive tendency to plaster their car, almost exclusively a Toyota, with bumper stickers. (possible idea for new sticker for Toyota owning liberals: I vote union but I buy foreign)

These bumper sticker disorder people are not content with just one "I hate Bush" logo on the back of their vehincle, nooooo. You may not get it then. A second "crossed out W" is required. This is followed by a "Defend America, defeat Bush" and "Bush is a retard."

Once the driver is absolutely, positively sure that you are vaguely aware of his/her/it's distaste for our current president we move onto the anti-war stickers. With slogans you may not have ever heard yet (at least not outside your mainstream newspaper) like "no blood for oil" and out of Iraq now" you get the notion that the driver is somewhat opposed to our invasion in the middle east. But just in case we will have also have a "Send Jenna and Barbara first" sticker so you know how they really feel.

Next up you have the stickers identifying the gender of the vehicle. This can sometimes be difficult because of the feminine nature of liberal men and the masculine nature of liberal women but it can be done. Stickers like "keep your values off my body" mean that a slut, I mean, a woman who wants to have anonymous sex with people and kill any baby that results from it, I mean, a "pro-choice" feminist, driving.

This one may also be a female: (do not judge by the hairy legs or general unattractive appearance)

Usually the stickers with swear words are driven by liberal men.

This is a serious problem for these people and they need help. The compulsion to continue to place bumer stickers in excessive of the available bumper space is clearly a disorder of some sort. It is only a matter of time before the rear winshield gets completely covered and this is a safety risk. Perhaps a more positive outlet for these liberals is necessary, they could try calling in to one of the 3 radio stations that carry Air America and vent their frustration there or just become college professors.

But please, stop ruining your Toyota.

18 comments:

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Mike said...

Don't forget that the socialists STILL have their Kerry/Edwards stickers on their cars, too.

Anonymous said...

I was in Boston on business this past June for one week. In traveling from Cambridge to Cape Code I did not see one Kerry-Edwards bumper sticker. In fact the only place I continue to see such bumper stickers is in Portland.

Are these people to stupid to realize the elections almost two years ago? And if they are that stupid why are they allowed to drive?

Chris Pieschel said...

My absolute favorites are the ones with the Kerry/Edwards stickers, 2 years after they LOST... Time for liberals to MoveOn.NOW!!!

Also the "Keep Portland weird" What the hell is that supposed to mean? I say make Portland less weird...

Kristopher said...

I like cutting these folks off while hauling a dear carcass.

When they flip us off, my wife and I point and laugh at them.

Kristopher said...

That's "deer carcass", damn it.

big mike said...

Don't forget the giant rainbow sticker denoting that the occupant is most likely gay...proving that they DO have an agenda that is contrary to most other people.

rickyragg said...

Daniel,

I don't know where you see all the Toyotas with this bumper blight, but I'll bet there's a far higher percentage of Subaru's likewise equipped.

Maybe they're all in MultCo., though.

Subaru's with Kerry/Edwards stickers are my favorites. It seems their drivers like to advertise that they're LOSERS.

Scottiebill said...

Chris: The bumper sticker advocating "Keeping Portland Wierd" surely must mean that they want to keep Taliban Tommy and Randy Leonard and Eric Sten on in City Hall. That's about as wierd as it can get, isn't it?

Anonymous said...

I like to give the Kerry ones a big L on the forehead at stoplights.

My favorite - Buckle Up!
It's harder for the Aliens to suck you out of your car

Ric said...

I always like the Ford 350's with the Kerry stickers.
It is a nice contradiction, don't you think.

For some reason, I don't see too many Gore stickers ... maybe they are under the Kerry ones.

Anonymous said...

This is not a new phenomenon. These are the same people who can clear a party just by showing up. If they had any brains they'd wonder why, when they enter a conversation circle, everyone almost immediately needs to leave to go to the bathroom, hit the hors douvres, or refil their drink.

Amy the Razor said...

There are male Democrats? I couldn't tell.

Scottiebill said...

Amy the Razor: There are certainly male Dumocrats. All one has to do is read the letters to the editor in the fishwrap. It prints Bush-bashing letters from the same writers on a regular basis on a ratio of about 10 to 1 against Bush, Cheney, etc.

Capitol 3 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Capitol 3 said...

and by the way all farmers are not liberal some are very very conservative .
Look at senator Gary George and jeff kropf for example they are both farmers and very conservative.
now you have no replacement for Gordon smith so you can not deport him.because you have no replacement.
look at Jeff kropf he is a farmer and very conservative so your viewpoints are out of league.

Capitol 3 said...

Hello to all and look at Jeff Kropf lets use him as example he is a farmer and very conservative and republican Gary George.they both are politicians and farmers!and very conservative.what does Jeff Kropf use that plane for?????lets see.

Anonymous said...

At least here in Eugene the bumper stickers have some practical use--they're apparently plastered on to keep the bumper from falling off the fume-spewing POS its owner is driving around. (Ever notice how many pro-environmental bumper stickers are featured on cars that couldn't possibly pass emissions tests? I want a bumper sticker that says "Prius for thee, but not for me.")