Saturday, February 17, 2007

You can take my boy's boyhood when you pry it from my cold dead hands

Maybe this isn't America anymore and someone forgot to tell me. I live in a nice family neighborhood. I have kids, most of the neighbors have kids and it's a dead end street. We live right near an elementary school.

Today I was outside playing basketball in the street with my boys and some of the neighbor boys and when a car comes we hold the ball and go to the sidewalk. The car will slowly pass through and we all wave... except for one foreign SUV. (maybe the SUV element to this story will get the libs worked up)

Two ladies sitting in the car wouldn't pass by us, they just stopped. We waited a few minutes and I finally said let's get back in the street. At that point they decided to move forward so we all moved back. Then the lady rolled down her window and said, and I'm serious, "you shouldn't let these kids play in the street, it's against the law" and gave me the most condescending look I've ever gotten from anyone.

SHE THEN ACTUALLY CALLED THE POLICE! The officer just rolled his eyes when he arrived but it really hit me, there are segments of our society who want all our boys to sit around on ritalin like stupified zombies. Or better yet act like girls.

The schools won't allow dodgeball or tag and competitive attitudes are discouraged. (everyone is a winner, even the losers)

Sorry to burst your bubble ladies but my boys play ball in the street, climb trees in the woods, enjoy shooting guns, punching each other, racing and winning.

If you hate kids then move to Portland were you don't have neighborhood streets. (you know, cause you have all that "livability") If you move to Sherwood then realize that families live here. (NOTE: two gays living together is NOT a family)

I've got half a mind to grab the Daisy and take the boys down to the creek to shoot some Nutria. (the exception to Sherwoods "no dishcarge of BB guns inside city limits" is if you are "dispatching" varmits) Maybe then I'll have them cut the heads off and put them on stakes in the front yard (next to the "Illegal immigration is a crime" sign) as a warning to those "sex and city" women who view children as a nuisance instead of our future.


The nutria: will he make good slippers?

38 comments:

beakeer said...

danny.....get a hobby....what about poker?...that sounds fun....right?

Max said...

Whoa! And you've got condescending looks from a lot of folks over time. How special! When did it become against the law to play street basketball? What an idiot biatch (deliberately mis-spelled, so as not to offend).

Amy the Razor said...

Daniel,

It would have been hard not slap her...however before you hunt that adorable little critter JUST SHOOT THAT OLD BAG!

bigmike said...

What a whore.

Calhoun said...

The "Nutria" ... what a lovely name. But what an ugly critter.

Nevertheless, I assert that all Nutria are our brothers, and to kill one of the bastards is fratricide. Nutria have rights too.

BEAR said...

hey, calhoun, the nutria are just doing a job that American rodents won't do! Your denigration of their paternity is clearly shameful. Just because they are a nuisance, use resources essential to the wellbeing of native species, and spread promiscuously is insufficient motivation to take corrective action.

BEAR said...

BTW, as in the fair city of Lake Oswego, no reason is too trite to forbid a call to the gendarmerie. Mr. Daniel, I sincerely hope that you left no unsightly footprints to mar the asphalt.

Bobkatt said...

Remember if you're shooting Nutria in the creek be sure it's not some guy snorkeling.

Daniel said...

Update: she called the cops A SECOND TIME and a different cop came who offered up the opinion that he didn't think that all the kids were old enough to be playing in the street. (at this point it was myself and two other parents supervising)

Let me tell you: I don't care what your opinion is. A badge doesn't mean a thing to me when it comes to raising my kids. If you are law enforcement then do that, enforce the law, keep your opinions to yourself when it comes to my daughter riding her bike with training wheels in front of my house.

Maybe he thinks I should take her to some taxpayer funded "bike park" where abstract art and murals featuring Mexican culture are everywhere.

How did I manage to survive my childhood riding my bike in the street?

Sue K. said...

That "lady" should be cited for misuse of the 911 system !!

Mike said...

WTF was she doing stopping in the middle of the street?? Isn't SHE the one breaking the law by impeding traffic or something like that??

Anonymous said...

Hey Mr. Law-Abiding Citizen, if you've got such a hard-on for the rule of law and for the rights of motorists to lay claim on taxpayer-financed roads at the expense of anyone who isn't on at least four wheels, then do us all a favor: Tell your kids to stay off the fucking street, and take that basketball and shove it up your STUPENDOUSLY hypocritical ass.

Amy the Razor said...

anon:11:46

Now, now, I may have to call te potty mouth police on you!

BEAR said...

Mr. Daniel, in keeping with the spirit of el gordo smith, I no longer support whatever it was I supported last week. In fact, I have called the sherwood police dept., with a (non-binding) request that you redeploy to......somewhere, and lose permission to play basketball. But I still support you, and only want what's best for you, regardless of what happens to fitness and families in Sherwood. BTW, my new mail-order bride (kaelri) is refusing to cook meat for me, and I may send her back to moonbat-istan on the next yak......poor yak.

Daniel said...

anon 11:46, what part of cold, dead hands do you not understand?

And that's funny Bear!

11:46 said...

What part of "stupdendously hypocritical ass" do you not understand?

Mike Mayhem said...

There goes Daniel breaking the law again...

Bob said...

Daniel for Mayor!

Amy the Razor said...

Mike,

I gave you credit for having a better comment than that old line . geeeeeeeeesh

Anonymous said...

Woman, lose that "power tool" shoved up between your legs and get moving!

Anonymous said...

Calling all cars, calling all cars. Please be advised that the laws and statutes of the State of Oregon do not -- repeat, do NOT -- apply to the children of Daniel Miglavs, nor shall they be bound by common sense.

Mike said...

11:46, 2:49, and mayhem,
Apparently your dislike for Daniel has temporarily diminished your comprehesion skills. Let me give you a little refresher:

"The officer just rolled his eyes when he arrived ..." (original post)

"... a different cop came who offered up the opinion that he didn't think that all the kids were old enough to be playing in the street." (Daniel's comment @ 8:06, italics mine)

Since neither cop cited Daniel for anything, HE DIDN'T BREAK THE LAW. (assuming the cops have a better knowledge of the law than you three and taking Daniel's word for it that he wasn't cited)

Sheilah said...

Daniel, Dec. 27, 2006:

"Ok, I'm a law abiding citizen. All laws. Even stupid meaningless laws that I disagree with."

Hmmm.

Daniel said...

Thought that Mike pointed it out: NO LAWS WERE BROKEN.

You guys are sad.

Anonymous said...

Geez, and I thought roads were just for vehicles. If they're for basketball, I guess we'd better have ODOT come out and put some regulation stripes down to accomodate Daniel's special needs -- court boundaries, free throw line, etc. This opens up limitless opportunities, a new day in Oregon. Football on 82nd Avenue, anyone?

Bobkatt said...

If you think that a father shouldn't play hoops with his kids in the street then you're a retard and need to crawl back under the rock you came out of.
This ignorant woman is probably one of the ones that thinks we need all day kindergarten in order to provide our kids with more indoctrination on tolerance.

Honest Abe said...

Uh, Amy the Nasty, really, you are advocating that Daniel the gangbanger meth dealer should "shoot that old bag"?

Daniel, you have got to be the most corny fool I have ever seen. "Cold dead hands"...that comment is so old and tired. Your little brats will probably be following in their "fathers" footsteps soon enough, banging and dealing meth. The sooner the cops get them into LEDS, the quicker we get them off of the street. Literally.

Daniel said...

That liberals "care about the 'brats,' I mean children" is so obvious these days.

Can we make that into a campaign slogan? "We need higher taxes... for the brats!"

wrench said...

Daniel

I'm a little surprised and disapointed that you're responding to some of these posts. It only impedes on the amount of respect anyone gives you. I feel that if someone says something in stupidity, don't respond. Instead, let the person's stupidity reveal itself. Don't make petty arguments that only succeed in suggesting a low amount of self control.

Those are just my thoughts.

Anonymous said...

How about a little soccer after work tonight, where the northbound lane of I-5 veers off to I-205? Hell, they've got three lanes there, we'd only need one. Daniel, can your kids come join us?

Anonymous said...

I think it's pretty amazing that you are willing to take time out of your day to go out and play with your kiddos. So many parents wont. I say kudos to you, and have a wonderful day.

Sue said...

You were kind to call them "ladies" as if they were gentle & noble.
Perhaps they should be called women or just plain old scroogy-bags. I'm a 70 year-old, so I qualifiy to judge them!

Amy the Razor said...

Abe,

You crush me..

ha said...

Anonymous, you're a turd licking moron.

Get some comprehension skills. Daniel said in his original post that when a car comes down the street, the move to the side and hold the ball until the vehicle passes.

Seems like pretty plain english to me. Maybe if you had finished skool you would be able to understand it?

Anonymous said...

Yeah Danny, there is a nice stretch of I-5 out by my office (I-5/Lake Oswego Exit) you could play basketball on with your delinquent little "brats". Or, we could have you out on 1-5/405 interchange for your little family fightclub session. Just let us know when so we can get some pop corn and candy and watch the game. Entertain us monkey!

Amy the Razor said...

Anon,

Are you one of those open minded liberals? If you are please go back to one of your 4/20 get together and remind yourself of the acceptence part of your dogma.

liberalbutreal said...

scoogy-bags! lmao you go grandma!

anyway...playing ball in the street is a part of growin' up for cryin' out loud. Dang, we used to play "kick the can" in the dead black of the new moon and I wouldn't trade those memories for a thousand shares of microflaccid.

i second the notion that it's awesome that daniel gets involved with his kids, spends time with his neighbors and takes pride in his neighborhood.

them scoogy-bags are nothing more than what we used to call busy-bodies. if they're not careful, their house will get TP'd!

long live civil disobedience.

bigmike said...

For the record,

There are kids playing basketball on my street everyday too. I guess we really have an epidemic on our hands.

Do we live on the same street Daniel?